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The greatest of them all: Will the 2010 team succeed where Johan Cruyff failed?

GIVE 11 good reasons to love a country. You could struggle with some, but not the Netherlands. Forget mighty empires. As one of the smallest countries in Europe, it casts a long shadow over the world, and a benevolent pall at that. So here we go.

Goalkeeper – the modest invader

British history books will tell you that these isles were last successfully invaded in 1066. Cobblers. On November 5, 1688, a 11,000-strong army headed by the Dutch monarch William of Orange made landfall near Brixham, in Devon. Convinced that his battle-hardened, largely mercenary troops could best any force that might face them in mainland Britain, William nonetheless did his best to avoid outright conflict in the expectation (successfully, as it turned out) that the wobbling reign of James II might collapse without the need for combat.

But it was wrong to call this the Bloodless Revolution, although the invasion is often more commonly referred to as the Glorious Revolution. There were two battles in England, but it was in Scotland and in Ireland, in the Jacobite Risings and the Williamite War in Ireland, that the Dutch hammer came down hardest. And it is in Northern Ireland, where the Protestant marching season is organised by Orange orders, that William II’s victory at the Battle of the Boyne in 1690 still provides a focus for division between the two sectarian communities.

Left back – Paul Verhoeven

If you are a man of a certain age and you claim you don’t like at least one of this Amsterdam film maker’s offerings, you haven’t seen them (in which case, why not?) or you are a liar and clearly out to impress someone.

"Get ready for a surprise..."

Always on rocky ground with his darkly, delightfully visceral work, he was effectively booed out of Hollywood with his 1995 turkey, Showgirls. But prior to that, he was responsible for one of the most era-defining movies of the 1980s, Robocop, which took violence to new levels of acceptability, and for the schlock sex of the much-talked-about Basic Instinct. However, by far away his finest two-and-a-bit hours was the Arnie vehicle Total Recall, which married Philip K Dick’s clever, clever future musings with a healthy bucket of blood and gore. And while some of it looks terribly dated now, the blockbuster set new technical standards on special effects.

Verhoeven would return with one last fanboy favourite, Starship Troopers. Here, he realised his talent for exciting in cinema goers the black, xenophobic pleasure of having murderous bugs splattered before their eyes. Base, but just try to say you didn’t enjoy that feeling.

Right back – the limited company

Capitalists the world over should give thanks for the Dutch East India Company. While this quasi-paramilitary organisation would garner a fearsome reputation for getting its own way by any means necessary, it was also the first business in the world to issue stock. Being able to finance its foreign ventures before they were undertaken gave the Vereenigde Oost-Indische Compagnie (VOC) an enormous advantage over its competitors.

Between 1602 and 1796, the VOC was able to import more than 2.5 million tons of Asian goods on 4,785 ships, monopolising the spice trade, while its nearest rival, the English East India Company, could only manage a fifth of the tonnage on 2,690 ships. It eventually went under in 1800, but it had given its home country a hold in the Far East in the shape of the East Indies. However, where the Dutch led, the British soon took over. The East India Company would assume control of the Indian subcontinent until the mutinies of 1857, and set the basis for the City of London, still one of the world’s most important financial centres.

Centre back – Camus’ inspiration

There is no greater football fan and philosopher than the Albert Camus. But while his most famous work, L’Étranger (The Stranger), is set in his native French Algiers, La Chute (The Fall) is largely set in Amsterdam. A series of monologues in which the narrator, the Parisian lawyer Jean-Baptiste Clamence, looks back upon a life of good works and increasingly sees futility in all of it, his ideas are given physical form in the shape of the Dutch city’s famed waterways. He tells the stranger he is relaying his life story to:

“Have you noticed that Amsterdam’s concentric canals resemble the circles of Hell? A middle-class Hell, of course.”

More on Amsterdam and its pleasures later…

Centre back – the other Dutch Master

Wheat Fields, by Jacob van Ruisdael, painted around 1670

Van Gogh, of course (anyone see the recent brilliant Dr Who ending involving a bit of time travel on the part of the obsessive artist?). Vermeer, certainly. And who could leave out Rembrandt? But what about Jacob van Ruisdael?

Although an acknowledged Dutch Master (he lived and painted between 1628 and 1682), his preference for landscapes perhaps precluded the completion of a piece as acknowledged as the Girl with the Pearl Earring. However, his work was certainly superior to Johannes Vermeer’s landscapes. Combining the darkness of Carravagio (as many of the Dutch Masters did) with the particularity of Constable (you can also see elements of his approach in JMW Turner’s work, too), van Ruisdael’s work often looked like it was painted in the last half-hour of sunlight.

Somewhat rehabilitated in recent times, his works hang all over the UK, in places as diverse as Floors Castle in Roxburghshire and Woburn Abbey. But my favourite, The Banks of the River, can be found in Edinburgh National Gallery of Scotland.

Left wing – best driving song ever?

I’ve been drivin’ all night, my hands wet on the wheel

There’s a voice in my head that drives my heel.

No wonder Clarkson likes it so much.

If the name of the tune, Radar Love, and Golden Earring, the band that made it, don’t ring a bell, all you need is the first two bars of the bassline and you’ll know it. First released in 1973, it was a modest hit. But, like so many other songs from way back when, nothing works quite like nostalgia. And, just in case enough people haven’t heard it to recognise it and buy it, Radar Love is used in everything from adverts to films like Wayne’s World 2 to – yes – Top Gear. However, it is a bonafide classic, and we can’t say that about too much music out of Holland.

Right wing – the Boers

Controversial choice. But these aren’t the Afrikaaners who plumped for Apartheid. These are the dirt-poor hill farmers grubbing a living off the dusty rocks of the Veld who took on the biggest empire in the world and won. Twice. These were the otherwise peaceable settlers who had their sovereign homelands invaded by British forces and their families put into the world’s first concentration camps. And these are the people that wrote the rule book on guerrilla warfare.

Although the Boers featured Huguenots, Scandinavians, Greeks, Poles, English, Irish and others in their ethnic mix, they were overwhelmingly from Holland – boer is the Dutch word for farmer. So there will something of a pleasant historical irony if the Netherlands win tonight.

Central midfield – Anton Corbijn

Kinda monochrome: Miles Davis, by Anton Corbijn

If you have held any interest in popular culture over the last three decades, you will have seen some of Anton Corbijn’s work. Starting out as a music photographer, he snapped David Bowie, Miles Davis, Captain Beefheart, Robert de Niro and Clint Eastwood, among others, before moving into album sleeve design, including for some of the world’s best known artists, such as The Rolling Stones, Metallica, REM and Green Day. If you own a copy of U2′s The Joshua Tree, then you own something he designed.

He has made videos for scores of recording artists, such as Johnny Cash, The Killers, Cold Play and Nirvana. He is a long-term collaborator with Depeche Mode, having shot practically all their promos since the mid 1980s, including the award-winning Enjoy the Silence. So perhaps there was little surprise when he decided to make his feature film debut, based on the biography of Ian Curtis’ widow Deborah, Control was showered with plaudits and prizes, including best film award at the 2007 British Film Awards.

Central midfield – Barcelona FC

“I always say that Barca play Dutch football. In Real Madrid it can be 11 Dutch players – they even wouldn’t play as Dutch football as Barca do. The Dutch tradition is always there even without any Dutch player.”

So said Madrid legend Ferenc Puskás. Thing is, a lot of Dutch players have plied their trade at the Catalan club. The roll call, since Johann Cruyff’s heyday of the early 1970s, is close to titanic. It includes Johan Neeskens, Danny Muller, Ronald Koeman, Richard Witschge, Michael Reiziger, Winston Bogarde, Bowdejwin Zenden, Philip Cocu (currently assistant coach to Bert Van Marwijk), Marc Overmars, both De Boers, Giovanni van Bronckhorst, Edgar Davids, Patrick Kluivert and, as coaches, Louis van Gaal and Frank Rijkaard.

Of course, there are plenty of Dutch superstars that have not played their football at the Nou Camp, such as Arjen Robben, Ruud Gullit, Marco van Basten, Ruud Van Nistelrooy, and Edwin van der Sar, while there are now more Dutch at Real Madrid than at Barca. However, as with so many things Dutch, another long standing irony will become apparent if the Netherlands lose to Spain tonight – they will be beaten by a team their countrymen helped to create.

Hey, he's Spanish - but Cesc Gabregas was a product of Barca's Ajax-inspired youth academy

Key Spanish players such as Xavi Hernandez, Andres Iniesta, Cesc Fabregas, Carles Puyol and Gerard Pique all came up through Barcelona’s youth academy, while current Barca coach Pep Guardiola “was Johan Cruyff’s creation and he considers Johan as his mentor,” according to Puskás. Even the great man himself recognises this. ”Spain’s style is the style of Barcelona,” Cruyff wrote in his El Periodico column on Thursday. “Now, Spain is favorite to win the World Cup.”

Centre forward – Dennis Bergkamp’s wonder goal

It was 1998 and all of England was basking in the warmth of the arrival of a new footballing wunderkind. Michael Owen had turned the tables on the Argies, blasting through four players to score one of the best England goals of all time. Even though the Three Lions had gone out on penalties, nothing to could top this effort.

It took until Argentina’s next game. In the 89th minute, Dennis Bergkamp, football’s best known aviophobic, got under a 60-yard pass from Frank de Boer, brought it clean under control with the deftest of footwork, bounced it through Roberto Ayala’s legs and stuck it in the back of the net from the outside of his boot. Three utterly sublime touches, in quick succession. It left Clive Tyldesley spluttering for words and the rest of us gasping for breath.

A contender for greatest World Cup goal of all time. Amazingly, it didn’t even make Fifa’s Goal of the Century list. Michael Owen’s did, though. Number two.

Centre forward -Dutch cool

He's Dutch, he's cool. Ahem

If je ne sais quoi wasn’t so up itself and a little bit more friendly, it might be a little like something approaching Dutch cool. For many young men on a rite of passage, this means the coffee houses and brothels of Amsterdam. The rest of us see something more in the Dutch capital, an easy-going pace, relaxed, its citizens not wound up tight like so many other inhabitants of major European cities.

Why is this? Why do they seem to have everything so sorted, from public services to sensible working hours? Well, it’s worth noting that losing an empire seems to mean nothing to them. They appear to realise that they have no imperial role to play and so instead set their sights on remaining a smallish European country with a worldwide reputation for contributions to civilisation. So, for the above, and for coffee houses, for everyone there that speaks English better than most of Britain (that is, most of them) and for Eddie van Halen (OK – Dutch descendency) , cheer on the Oranje tonight.

* Today at 11am, Spain announces its WalesHome team (or is that the other way round?)